Where do I go from here?

It is not a new struggle.

I have felt similar emotions before, and yet the sting that comes with not knowing is ever present.

I feel as though I have spent the last four years getting ready, but I have nothing.

Some relationships have brought me great joy, and some great pain. Saying goodbye to both is hard.

Once the car doors closes the reflections begin.

I do not know when I will return. I do know that the people who have made my life what it is will not be together ever again, save for heaven.

Tears well in my eyes and memories flood my mind.

Where I am going is less clear now than it has ever been. Who I will be with, what I will do, where I will be... all question marks.

Tears cascade down my cheeks and mental images flash.

The race feels long. Longer than ever before, and I just finished part of it. Who am I running with?

I am independent, qualified, prepared, but alone.