5500+ Miles

I took a really long road trip during Christmas break. 5800 miles, 23 states, lots of loved ones and one amazing romance. Courtney and I were humbled over and over by the generosity and love that was extended to us during our journey. It was a beautiful 23 days.

Everything or Nothing

What philosophy to you subscribe more to: ''Everything is Nothing'', ''Nothing is Everything'' or ''Everything is Everything?''

This is taken from a journal entry from a couple of days ago:

Drew leaves in two days. I am very sad that he won't be with us anymore. In a way it feels as though all of our trips are ending with his, but then I remember the beautiful things we have packed into any two week period prior to this one. Surely it will be different, but it will also be good. I look forward to see the way our group dynamic changes after this amazing brother's absence.

He makes all of us laugh a lot with his insistent rap lyrics and off-the-wall ghetto vocab. He is and will forever be one of my best friends. He has imparted in me new and rewarding types of confidence that I never thought possible. He has allowed me to take it easy. Most importantly however, he has helped me to see the world for what it is. Nothing more, and definitely nothing less.

I always struggle to convey how important and meaningful a person is to me, how much I value the time I spend with them, or how much I care about their role in this kingdom. But I can never convey all that I feel. Not an entirely unique struggle I would imagine, but what if we could fully love someone. Fully show them their worth. And, fully experience how much I am worth. As I dreamt about earlier on this trip, maybe that is a part of heaven, being able to love transparently and to be loved fully.

Drew has the unique ability to convey how much my friendship means to him. Conversations are not forced, or are they overwhelmingly frequent but they are powerful. The time we have spent speaking to one another about family, love, relationships and people have been incredibly valuable, and irreplaceable. This dream I have had about a more transparent and thorough love has come closer and closer to fruition because of my time spent with Drew.

I am so thankful that he came on this trip, that he has taken the time to be here with us. I have left many of our conversations with a more beautiful understanding of what this kingdom is really about. We all came on this trip to expand our world view and to see more of the world, but more so, he came on this trip to invest in me, Erik and Jordan. To try and love us more fully.

I look forward to our brotherhood. I look forward to exploring more of this beautiful world with you. Never stop seeing people and places for what they are. Everything is Everything.

Bangkok or Bust... or Both

After reading the title to this blog, which I quickly wrote without much forethought, I chuckled a little bit. Anyways, I am leaving this magically dichotomous country known as India and I am headed to Thailand, which is getting a little more coverage in the press than the one I am in currently. I am a little nervous, but I am also meeting four strapping young men in two days. Yes. It will be awesome. I have not seen Drew or Ryan since October. Seeing Jordan and Erik is going to be great too. I have been missing my friends and family the last couple of days, especially during my thirty-eight hour train ride to Delhi on Easter. I do have a post that I would like to write about my Easter, but that will have to wait. Also, when I have some time I will post some photos from my six day trek along the Indian/Nepal border. Beautiful. Right now however, it is time for an hour long Tuk-Tuk ride through the maddening streets of Delhi. I am stoked. I hope all is well in bloggerville. I will be back.

Faces of Tibet

I have a lot going through my mind right now. I have been in a town called Mcleod Ganj for the last four days and I am loving it. Mcleod has become the home to the Tibetan Government as well as the Dali Lama. It is a very peaceful and tranquil place compared to other parts of India. Yesterday I hiked to a 8,600 foot ridge line that had spectacular views of a 16,000 foot Himalayan peak. The most profound moments however have been spent with a crew of Tibetan Monks who run the hostel I am staying at. Yeshi, Tenzin and I have spent the last three nights eating traditional Tibetan dinners together by candlelight. We have traded personal stories, explored the differences between Eastern and Western philosophies and shared our biggest struggles. It has been a treasure staying here with them. Each of them have shared their personal journeys through the Himalayans to seek refuge in India more than ten years ago. Stories of hope and of suffering have been shared.

At one point I asked Yeshi: "If you could go anywhere in the world where would you go?"

After much thought and consideration he responded with hopeful excitement, "Tibet!"

I proceeded to ask him, "If you could go anywhere other than Tibet where would you go?"

He closed his eyes and with a gentle softness responded with, "Heaven."


Today I took part in a very emotional "Free Tibet" rally. Tears were pouring and chants were being shouted. The Tibetans, both young and old, walked for nearly 12 kilometers down a 4,000 ft mountain to the town of Dharamsala to share their message. It was a very moving demonstration. If I can find a decent Internet connection I will share some photos... otherwise it would take hours to upload. I am about to go to meet with my Monk friends one more time for dinner. Tomorrow I take a bus out of Mcleod Ganj to Pathankot where I board a train to Varanasi. As soon as I am able I will post again. Until then, Peace and Love.

Here it is...

I would like to apologize to those of you who frequent this blog. For a number of months you have stopped by only to discover, once again, that I did not write anything. I want to tell you that I have been writing. I have actually been writing more frequently than ever before. My recent ramblings however, have been increasingly more personal in nature, and to be honest I haven't really wanted to post them on the world wide web.

Recently, I have begun to dabble in poetry, and hopefully, one day soon I will share it with you. Until then however, it will live in the confines of my little black moleskin journal. If you have mastered the ways of deceit and thievery you may be able to sneak a peak... but an easier way to hear/read some of this would be to go on a walk or sit across a table from me with a caffeinated beverage in hand. If however you live far away and we cannot look each other eye to eye, then I must first say that I probably miss you. Secondly, I would say that emails work pretty well. And, thirdly I would request your address because handwritten letters have become my new favorite (like red snow cones). 

So there it is. I hope that all of you are doing well. Oh yeah, don't forget to vote...

Peace and Love. 

Holy Week 2008

We drove straight down to San Diego, and it only took us 14 hours, which is six hours faster than the MapQuest estimation. Once we got to San Diego we went straight to the beach to take naps and hang out in the sun for the day. We ended up playing rugby on the beach with four french guys. That night we stayed with one of Drew's family friends in downtown San Diego. The next day we drove into Tijuana, Mexico and drove 160 kilometers south to Ensenada. After we ate some tacos and decided that Ensenada wasn't really what we were looking for we decided to drive across the Baja Penninsula. It took us about four hours and the drive was beautiful. The entire drive was spent on a curvy road winding it's way between boulder strewn hills. We got out and hiked quite a bit along the way. 

Once we arrived in San Felipe we saw some Mormon missionaries walking down the road, so we deicided to ask them about the beaches and places to eat. They didn't really help us in that department, but as we were leaving they told us that they had four extra beds at their house and that we were more than welcome to crash there since all of the camping and hotels were full because of Holy Week (which we later found out to be the largest vacation week in Mexico, hence the thousands of people everywhere we went). We spent two days in San Felipe just hanging out on the beach and playing on the abandoned ships. The water was warm and it was about 85 degrees. On Monday morning we took off and headed north to the border, and we crossed back into the United States just north of Mexicali, Mexico. We decided to go to Joshua Tree National Park to climb, hike and potentially do some backpacking. We ended up getting to the park at 4:00 pm and it was stunning. 

Joshua Tree has some of the most remarkable desert landscapes I have ever seen. All of the campgrounds were full so we decided to hike into a backcountry area to camp. At this point we had all decided that we were midway through thr best road trip any of us had ever been on. That night however, ended up being the worst night of my life. I was so sick with a terrible cold, I was coughing and congested all night, I was hallucinating for some reason and I had a mild case of vertigo combined with a migraine, vomiting and freezing cold temperatures. I thought that I was going to have to hike out and go to a hospital. Strangely, the next morning I felt great and we spent the whole day hiking and climbing on the huge rocks that identify Joshua Tree. 

We ended up spending most of the day in Joshua Tree, and in the afternoon we drove to Redlands, California. We stayed with one of Drew's best friends who happens to go to University of Redlands. The next morning we went into Los Angeles and had Chipotle with a couple of friends from California. After eating we drove north to San Jose, where we stayed with a friend from linfield, whos father is a psychology professor at Stanford. 

Thursday morning was spent playing pick up soccer and basketball games at the Stanford Campus. That afternoon we headed into San Francisco and saw all of the tourist sights. A bunch of people were in San Francisco for spring break, so we met up with them and spent the evening with them. Tom, amazing redheaded friend of mine from Longmont, goes to school south of San Francisco and he met us with us. It was really great to see him, and to check out his stomping grounds. The next morning (Friday) we woke up early and drove across the golden gate bridge, and drove all the way to Redwoods National Park, which is along the northern California coastline. It was so humbling to be driving and walking amongst those giant trees. They are truly massive. 

The rest of the drive was spent on curvy roads, winding through Oregon's southwest mountain ranges. Sadly, after driving 2900 miles I got the first and only speeding ticket on the trip. I was in Oregon and there weren't any speed limit signs for over five miles, and I thought the speed limit was 65 miles per hour and I later found out from the ranger that the speed limit was 55 mph. Because I have a Colorado license they aren't able to take points away, so instead they stuck me with a hefty fine. As I said before, we got back to McMinnville last night around midnight. All of us were tired, sick and ready for our own beds, but the trip was truly incredible.

Happy Birthday Bryan!!!

 Today my roommate, Bryan Alford, is turning twenty-one. I am excited about this because there have been many times during the last semester that I wanted to do things requiring you to be twenty-one, and he couldn't participate. If you don't know Bryan than let me tell you he is a passionate, loving individual who seeks intimacy and depth. 

Bryan, you have become an true brother. You have an incredible ability to be who you are, regardless of what people think, say or do. Your zeal for depth has carried you down many unique roads, and I am sure that your future will be no different. God does a seemingly strange job sometimes at introducing critical people into your life, and you have turned out to be just that, critical. You have taught me many things, most of which are yet to be realized. Our friendship has deepened over the past three years, but I can say over the past six months it has truly flourished. I have loved being your roommate. I am excited to grow along this journey of life with you as a friend. Thank you for everything. Happy birthday brother. 

Fifteen Minutes...GO!!!

I am sitting here and I couldn't narrow down all of the crazy thoughts going on inside my head, so I decided just to write for five minutes straight and see what comes of it. 

A couple of days a go a great friend of mine left Portland to fly across the country to New York City. If any of you know Frank then you know that he is an incredibly passionate, eccentric, and unique individual. The best way to describe our seventeen day road trip through the west side of this beautiful country is...exceptional. Frank has never been to Colorado, Wyoming, Montana or Idaho, so we decided to drive from Longmont to Portland. On the way we stopped in Wyoming, Bozeman (for a week), Missoula, Cors de Lane, and the Dalles. It was a seventeen day trip, that was filled with great people, conversation, skiing, amazing food, wonderful weather, old friends, new friends, and a couple discoveries within those already existing friendships. When Frank flew out of Portland on Sunday night it felt as though I was coming down off a drug. The way he inspires and ignites a person into action is unlike anyone I have ever met. With all that said, Thank you for prioritizing our friendship. Thank you for coming here and for helping me reignite something within myself.

Last night as our local college ministry I was sitting there worshipping and could not stop thinking about what I would say if Jesus asked me what he asks his disciples, "what is it that you know about me?" I kept thinking about the implications of this question. Many would give Jesus the answer that they think he wants to hear. They would summarize the historical understanding of Jesus. Others would give Jesus an inflated understanding, exaggerating what they know and leaving out all the bits that they don't. I would imagine that I would try an impress his with what I have to say. I would tell paraphrase Brian McLaren's understanding, toss in a little of C.S. Lewis' and maybe sprinkle a bit of Rob Bell on top, but Jesus wants none of that. Jesus wants our experience, more specifically our relationship, to provide his truth. He wants us to have an active relationship filled with the confusion, doubts, struggles and joys that come with it. So, as I was sitting in church I was thinking about how I would answer this question. As I was thinking about this I went to the side of the room where the lord's supper was. I walked up grabbed a piece of bread and a small half ounce glass of grape juice. I slowly walked back to my place, while in deep worship, and thought even more how I would answer his question. While deep in thought, prayer and worship I took the bread to my mouth. Jesus seemed to have helped me out in answering his own questions. My eyes were closed, and I instantly saw the smiles, tears, hugs and laughter of hundreds of people that I care about. I couldn't get the faces of my best friends, family and serogant brothers out of my minds eye. Jesus has manifested his self, and more importantly his truth, in us. 

I am starting school and am excited about what that means. In five months I will have two degrees. In five months I will no longer be financially dependent on my family. In five months I may be riding my bike across the west side of this country. In five months a new world will suddenly stand before me.

(Sorry for the poor grammar and sentence structure)

Juarez, Mexico

There is something special that happens when you realize how large this world actually is. Spicy food, language barriers and surface level cultural differences are not what impact us at our core. A person’s heart can change when they are exposed to the needs of this world that have yet to be met. When we are exposed to tangible relationships, emotional hardships and a visible lack of justice a profound change can occur. Our hearts were changed. I suppose the purpose of this letter is to thank you for making it hard. Thank you for exposing us to the injustices of this world. Thank you for taking a part in the change that many of us experienced while being in Juarez.

The trip began on a cold morning in Longmont,

 Colorado, with a group of twenty-one college students trying to figure out how to p

ack all of our tools, clothes, and sleeping bags into four vehicles. Ten hours of driving, and a stop at a Chinese buffet delivered us to El Paso, Texas, where we stayed the night in a church gymnasium. Naturally, a game, similar to American Gladiators’ Powerball, broke out in the gymnasium. After a considerable amount of socks, skin and sweat were sacrificed we called it a night. Confession: our first construction project was repairing the ceiling fan we accidentally broke.

The next morning we crossed into Mexico. El Paso and Juarez sit side by side, but the two cities are strikingly different. As we crossed the Rio Grande/Rio Bravo del Norte the landscape transformed from skyscrapers, advertisements, and consumption into factories, working-class barrios, and production. This was when many people began to realize how large the need actually is. We picked up our tools from the warehouse and set out to find the job sight, quite the struggle in a city that has grown much faster than its infrastructure. Have you ever tried to look for a vacant lot in a city with almost no street signs, few paved roads, and plenty of dirt fields? How, exactly, do you discover the location of a house that hasn’t been built yet? After an hour or so of driving we found the dirt rectangle that would very soon become a three room, insulated, set of classrooms.

We began our project by leveling the ground so that we could lay the concrete foundation. This alone took the whole first working day. Our first night in Mexico was New Years Eve and we really wanted to celebrate New Years like a Mexican would. Sadly, on the way to the central plaza, one of our four vehicles broke down. Needless to say, we celebrated New Years Eve being pulled behind a dodge truck by a towrope. It ended up being one of the most memorable New Years Eve celebrations in recent memory. By the time we arrived at the building site the next day the ground had settled a little and it was time to start building a house. Brandon, our Casas por Cristo staff member, fearless leader, and seasoned builder, delegated tasks and we set out to work. Framing, cutting, and foundation work were all completed simultaneously. By the time we broke for lunch, the concrete was curing, all of the necessary wood was cut, and most of the walls were framed. After a couple of sandwiches (and an unknown number of Mexican sodas) we returned to the work site. We began to set the walls, place the exterior insulation, and prepare for stucco. To our surprise, we had what looked to be a house after barely more than one full day of work.

We began our third day of work with an impromptu dance party. Nothing puts you to work on a cold winter morning like Brett’s techno workout mix. The third day was spent either on the roof, stretching chicken wire (for the stucco), or building one of the best retaining walls you will ever see. By sundown we had finished the roof, begun hanging dry wall, and had a solid start on our landscaping, the first landscaping a Casas por Cristo house had ever seen. That evening, Kyle prepared an amazing meal for all twenty-one of us to enjoy together in our church home. Our last day of building was a full one. We arrived at the work site, turned on some (more) sweet jazzercise music, and set out to finish the house. After a couple of hours, the stucco was complete, the drywall was nearly finished and we could

 begin putting on the final touches. Most people were inside at this point, mudding the walls and painting, thankful to be out of the freezing January wind. By the time the sun had gone down, we were putting up the light fixtures, moving the custom built bookshelf, and really outdoing ourselves with the xeroscaped plants and monsoon resistant ground cover. After about three and a half days we had a hou

se. Sea foam green paint, bookshelves, landscaping, two ceramic space heaters and what will hopefully be a long lasting safe and warm place full of memories, learning, and joyfulness.

During the dedication service we discussed how a house, in and of itself, might not be a meaningful gift. What gives the house its significance, what brings out its potential, are the ways i

n which it is used. Conversely, we often take structure for granted, failing to acknowledge how crucial warmth, shelter and safety are for our relationships. The time spent with Carolina, and the rest of the family, was the actual reason we went down to Juarez. Although we may have forgotten it at times, we did not go to simply build a house. Instead, our purpose, both in going to Juarez and in being a Christian, is to contribute in building a kingdom. A kingdom where relationships are prized, love and mercy flow between us, where needs are met, and where injustices are realized and absolved. We built a beautiful house, but hopefully, with your help, we contributed in the building of what is going to be a beautiful kingdom.

Portland or Bust...

I wanted to quickly explain why I haven't been blogging as of late. Two weeks ago I was completely in over my head in school work, last week I had two tests and two papers, and this week Kyle has driven eighteen hours to come and visit me for Thanksgiving week. Erik is leaving Bozeman, Montana in the midst of a blizzard to drive here today. Yes, they are amazing, I am incredibly thankful for these two guys who took it on themselves to get to Portland this Thanksgiving holiday. Just to let you know...by the time you both return to your respective institutions you will have driven for a combined total of 50 hours. Bad ass. For those of you who are not making the trek to Portland this week I miss you dearly and can't wait to see you when I get home for Christmas.

Have an amazing Thanksgiving with your loved ones.

Power of Compound Interest

“The most powerful force in the universe is compound interest.”
~ Albert Einstein

I am sitting in my favorite coffee shop, sipping on my favorite Chai, and thinking about the last ten months of my life. Strange at it may be, I decided to write an e-mail to one of my dear friends that I met while in New Zealand. His name is Frank, and I have briefly blogged about him earlier this year, but for some reason I had a hankering to see how he was doing. I had some frustrations on my heart that I new he would be able to relate to, and I wanted to see how he was doing.

We ended up having a great conversation about current struggles, joys and experiences, but what was most meaningful was something that he said at the very end of the conversation. He told me that he has been thinking a lot about the aforementioned Einstein quote and its relational implications. Sure, compound interest is an incredible investment tool, capable of increasing ones wealth at a staggering rate, but what does this mean for my life as a whole?

Frank went on to explain how he has met a bunch of great people over the last couple of years in his worldwide travels, and keeping in touch with all of those people has been incredibly difficult, and at times overwhelming. As many of those who read this know, a large percentage of my closest friends are apart from one another most of the time. God has splattered us all over North America, tossing us into a variety of college, work, marital, and missionary environments. Keeping in touch over the past three years hasn't gotten easier either. Frank and I were discussing the frustrations that come with being apart from those you love and care about. There are so many times throughout the week when I want to call a close friend and see how they are doing, but I always talk myself out of it. I think to myself, "I don't have two hours to talk right now, I should probably wait until I do..." I succeed in rendering myself worthless.

Back to the quote, "The greatest force in the world is compound interest," I began to think about how I could apply this to my friendships. Basically I realized that two and half hour conversations aren't necessary to maintain, or even enhance, a relationship. All that I need to do is invest in that friendship. Simple, twenty minute conversations can yield incredible results. Trusting that God will use that precious time is a necessary component to any relationship, and I haven't been doing a very good job at that lately. I need to remember that God can and will use my meager efforts to do good.

To think that my efforts, are going to be used as a tool by my creator is pretty amazing. Even more, to think that my insufficient attempts will be made sufficient after God has his way with them is both encouraging and empowering. The same force that paints every sunset wants your and my friendship to be amazing. God wants us to experience the love and community he intended, and from my limited experience, he has helped us out when we fall short. That indeed is the greatest force I can think of.

Since being back in Colorado I haven't really thought about New Zealand as much as I would have liked. I have spent a significant amount of time sitting and reflecting, but I never seem to think about my coming home from a distant country, that I lived in for five months. Many people have asked me what I learned, how I have changed, or what I will do with my experiences. And, every time I respond with some sort of constructed answer, mainly so that the conversation will continue, hopefully shedding actual light on my experiences. The truth of the matter is that I have no idea what I learned, I am not sure how I have changed, and my future is just as unknown as before I left.

I began to re-read parts of my journal that I kept while in New Zealand, and I stumbled across a section that I wrote just before coming home. Erik and I were great friends prior to going, but spending nearly every minute of five months together proved to be both testing and incredibly rewarding. For all intensive purposes Erik and I were married, aside from the whole romantic, intimate, sex stuff. We shared our money, a car, the apartment, and nearly all decisions...basically everything. With that in mind:

"I am sitting in the Brasilia Coffee shop, for what could be the last time. Everyone flew in yesterday. Today they all went to hike up Avalanche peak and I opted to stay here for a much needed 'chill out day.' I have begun to read Jill Fredston's 'Rowing to Latitude.' It is about a husband and wife's kayak journey through the Arctic circle. She constantly uses rowing metaphors to explain aspects of her life and experiences.

She mentions that whenever she goes on a trip with her husband she has to take on 'expedition behavior.' Jill describes expedition behavior as: 'It involves a conscious commitment to get along despite physical exigencies and personal idiosyncrasies. How much you disagree with a person at times becomes irrelevant. It is your responsibility to be amicable and to work to diminish your own offensive habits, even if you are convinced you don't have any.'

It is interesting to read this and try to think about all that I have learned since arriving here. For the first time in my life I have experienced what it is like to be around somebody the vast majority of the time, and how to behave to preserve both experiences and friendships. Erik and I have spent more time together than ever before, and maybe ever again. This testing and exciting stage in our friendship is coming to a close. Many have thought, including myself at times, that there would be arguments, resentments, and turmoil. But, there hasn't. I appreciate Erik for asking me straight out if I am being bothered by him, and I appreciate his willingness to diminish his own offensive habits for the sake of our expedition. There have been times when an argument was likely, but it never happened.

Right now I am sitting in Christchurch while Erik is taking his family and friends out on an incredible adventure. This time to reflect on his and my friendship was unanticipated, but like any other this "chill out session," as it has become known, has proved very rewarding. It has been incredible to have such a great friend and brother to go on this journey with. The lessons that we have both learned these past five months are sure to be priceless. We have both matured in ways that are to complex to understand right now, but are sure to be valuable well into the future. Thanks for blessing us with the grace to forgive, and the drive to understand one another. "

Thank you Erik for overlooking my inadequacies. Thanks for saying what was on your mind when I wasn't willing to share what was on mine. Thanks for making it a point to excuse my idiosyncrasies and selfishness. Thank you Erik for what was and will continue to be a great expedition.

Home again home again jiggity jig...

I arrived back in colorful Colorado exactly a week ago today, and there has been a whirlwind of events since my arrival. Two of my dear friends, Bryce and Kate, got married last Saturday and they are now on their honeymoon in Mexico. Erik and I were members of the wedding party among other great friends of mine. During the three days leading up to the wedding we had some awesome time with Bryce and the fellas.

I realized that the love and affection Bryce has for Kate, and vice versus, is just another beautiful testament to God's glory. In the same way I stare in awe at sunsets or huge mountains, I found myself staring in amazement at the way God has created these two people to perfectly accentuate the other. It was incredible to reflect on the years I have known Bryce, and see how beautifully Kate has impacted his life. Basically, this past week I found myself in a state wonder. Wondering how, and why, we are all so blessed.

I don't have to pay to put pictures on the Internet anymore so I am posting a few pictures from the last couple of weeks I was in New Zealand. The majority of them are from the West Matukituki Valley near Mount Aspiring. I have not had the time to digest my experiences coming home, as a matter of fact I haven't even unpacked all my bags, but as soon as I have more thoughts I will be sure to post.